K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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