4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Hippo gnu deer
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
