these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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