my vag is so smooth its legendary
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
