Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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