Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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