I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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