I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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