I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
