Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize