Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
