New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
there was a trapeze. enough said
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
