I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night