North Korea, Best Korea!
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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