Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
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Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
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You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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