New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
