Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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