Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Nobody cheats on THIS.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize