Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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