In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Say something about gay babies.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
