Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
