Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
