We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
