so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
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