i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize