How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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