I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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