I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
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Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...