you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.