omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
