The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
