hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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