I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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