im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I need to sanitize my soul.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
