I feel like I'm in dance class right now
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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