it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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