new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
