I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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