i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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