remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
you inspire me to be a worse person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
All I want is dick and wine.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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