Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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