I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
This is classic penis vs brain.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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