dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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