I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
