the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I just want nice things and good sex
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize