Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
