Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
