Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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