"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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