Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
