She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I just googled if crying burns calories
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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