So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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