I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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